Female Sexual Response Cycle
Have you ever wondered exactly what happens to the body during sexual activity?
“When we discover the many intricate details of our bodies that provide so many intense, wonderful physical sensations for husbands and wives to enjoy together, we can be sure that God intended us to experience full satisfaction in the marriage relationship.”
Focus on self. This is the one of the best times to be selfish in your relationship. Wives you must be willing to RECEIVE during lovemaking if you want to give the greatest pleasure to your husband. Being self-focused sexually can help women achieve orgasm. The greatest gift wives can give their husbands is to be sexually satisfied. A husband’s greatest sexual fulfillment comes from lighting the fire of desire in his wife and watching it roar into flames of passion and pleasure. Understand these phases of the female sexual response:
- Foreplay / Arousal
- Orgasm / Climax / Intercourse
Foreplay for Women
Foreplay for Men
Desire or libido, is the yearning, want or interest in initiating or responding to sexual advances. Desire is commonly identified as the first phase in the human sexual response. Common sense tells us that’s so. But I’ve found that although I might not have been thinking sexual thoughts or feeling particularly sexy; I pushed myself to get started when my spouse approached me, it felt good and I found myself getting into it. I thought I lacked sexual desire but have found that for me, desire doesn’t happen until I have been physically aroused! Movement creates emotion within the body to become aroused.
Below are some problem areas to look at and may draw some attention to you because it’s something you deal with:
- Hormonal imbalance
- Sexual, physical or emotional abuse
- Low self-esteem
- Poor body image
- Time constraints
- Going along to get along
- Lack of forgiveness
So, for those of you who thought you weren’t sexual, it may be that you have always been sexual, but just didn’t understand that you needed sexual stimulation and arousal before sexual desire could occur. Sometimes I just need to go forward with the sexual experience committing myself mentally to it. I have to remind myself that I got into it last time, and I liked it.
Once the stimulation is sufficient, I get swept up in the ecstasy of the experience. You’d think the need for a conscious choice would go away, but sex is still a decision I have to make EVERY time. It’s like an ‘act of faith’ to embark on the sexual experience without the sexual desire in hand. With that said you may have a low sexual desire and it’s good for you to find out why.
‘Feel in the mood for sex’
‘Feel connected to their partner’
‘Feel loved and cherished by their partner’
‘Feel attractive, sexy or desirable’
‘Feel wanted or desired by their partner’
‘Have a romantic environment’
And while this is what woman say, what scientists and sexologists have shown to be true in their research that desire depends on:
1. An ability to become aroused
2. A healthy attitude towards sex
3. Proper sexual functioning
So when a woman is experiencing low libido or loss of desire, one of these three components has more than likely been impacted.
“Orgasm is the physiological response which brings sexual intercourse to its natural and beautiful termination…….in the moment just preceding orgasm, muscular tension suddenly arises. At the moment of greatest muscular tension all sensations seem to take one further rise upward. The women tenses beyond the point where, it seems, it would be possible to maintain such tension for a moment longer. And indeed it is it possible, and now her whole body suddenly plunges into a series of muscular spasms. These muscular spasms take place within the vagina itself, shaking the body with waves of pleasure. If a women is sexually satisfied by her orgasmic experience she will discharge the neurological and muscular tension developed in the sexual buildup.”
Sometimes a women does not know if she has experienced an orgasm. If you feel your vagina contracting involuntarily, if you feel excited at first, and later feel calm and physically satisfied, you can take this as evidence that you have had an orgasm even bough perhaps a weak one.
Orgasm might also be described as pleasurable sensations that slowly build, until the sexual tension bursts into a shooting star throughout the body.
Many couples experience difficultly reaching orgasm. Just as men need sufficient stimulation of the penis to climax or ejaculate, women need sufficient stimulation of the clitoris to reach orgasm.
Most cases of failure to attain orgasm that I have read began with poor preparation for marriage, a frustrating and fearful honeymoon, followed by a prolonged period of disappointment and boredom in marriage that conditioned the wife to feel there was no hope for fulfillment.
When sexual energy and tension are not satisfactorily or fully released, this can cause anger or frustration, a dislike of lovemaking, and resentment toward the spouse. Most women don’t realize there is a relationship between the lack of sexual release during lovemaking and risk of physical and emotional “dis-ease”
Each time the stimulated wife fails to reach orgasm, this represents some injury to the pelvic organs and to her emotions, often leaving her with nervousness, weakness, fatigue, and moderate to severe pelvic pain and low back pain.
Just a small word about Quickies. Couples should work toward complete fulfillment in the lovemaking experience, but sometimes that may not be possible due to time or energy.