You’re ready to introduce a vibrator into your relationship but you’re not sure how.
You’re worried that your partner will feel:
But it’s not about them not being enough but about you wanting more and to increase the experience and pleasure you experience together.
That’s your first goal of the conversation. To talk about increasing the experience, focusing on the positive, not what you’re not getting.
It might look like this, “Hey...what are your thoughts on vibrators? I thought they could be a fun addition and something we could experiment with.” Or “I’ve been thinking about something I’d love to try with you.”
Something that’s common in these conversations to pop up are the sexual “shoulds” such as:
▪️”I should be enough”
▪️“if I were good, you wouldn’t need a vibrator”
These are often rooted in old, inaccurate ideas around how sex “should” be and not based on principles of modern mutual pleasure.
If there is insecurity, remember, a vibrator can never replace a person, a caress, a connection, a cuddle, AND it can add spice, and fun, and ease and novelty. Vibration for all bodies can feel great.
You can find one on your own or you can shop together, which can also create the “we” experience if there is concern about a “me”.
Sending you nothing but positive vibes as you head into these conversations. You got this.